


Welcome to My Life

by BelphegorAckerman, Humanity_Strongest_001



Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: Depression, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Song Lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-23
Updated: 2020-11-23
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:40:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27683672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BelphegorAckerman/pseuds/BelphegorAckerman, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Humanity_Strongest_001/pseuds/Humanity_Strongest_001
Summary: Do you ever feel like breaking down?Do you ever feel out of placeLike somehow you just don't belongAnd no one understands you?
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	Welcome to My Life

_**"Welcome To My Life"** _  
  


_Do you ever feel like breaking down?_  
_Do you ever feel out of place_  
_Like somehow you just don't belong_  
_And no one understands you?_  
_Do you ever wanna run away?_  
_Do you lock yourself in your room_  
_With the radio on turned up so loud_  
_That no one hears you're screaming?_

_No, you don't know what it's like_  
_When nothing feels alright_  
_You don't know what it's like_  
_To be like me_

_To be hurt, to feel lost_  
_To be left out in the dark_  
_To be kicked when you're down_  
_To feel like you've been pushed around_  
_To be on the edge of breaking down_  
_And no one's there to save you_  
_No, you don't know what it's like_  
_Welcome to my life_

_Do you wanna be somebody else?_  
_Are you sick of feeling so left out?_  
_Are you desperate to find something more_  
_Before your life is over?_  
_Are you stuck inside a world you hate?_  
_Are you sick of everyone around?_  
_With their big fake smiles and stupid lies_  
_While deep inside you're bleeding_

_No, you don't know what it's like_  
_When nothing feels alright_  
_You don't know what it's like_  
_To be like me_

_To be hurt, to feel lost_  
_To be left out in the dark_  
_To be kicked when you're down_  
_To feel like you've been pushed around_  
_To be on the edge of breaking down_  
_And no one's there to save you_  
_No, you don't know what it's like_  
_Welcome to my life_

_No one ever lied straight to your face_  
_And no one ever stabbed you in the back_  
_You might think I'm happy, but I'm not gonna be okay_  
_Everybody always gave you what you wanted_  
_You never had to work, it was always there_  
_You don't know what it's like, what it's like_

_To be hurt, to feel lost_  
_To be left out in the dark_  
_To be kicked when you're down_  
_To feel like you've been pushed around_  
_To be on the edge of breaking down_  
_And no one's there to save you_  
_No, you don't know what it's like (What it's like)_

_To be hurt, to feel lost_  
_To be left out in the dark_  
_To be kicked when you're down_  
_To feel like you've been pushed around_  
_To be on the edge of breaking down_  
_And no one's there to save you_  
_No, you don't know what it's like_  
_Welcome to my life_  
_Welcome to my life_  
_Welcome to my life_

* * *

Lucifer sat on the edge of his bed, feet dangling over the side. He had been crying and now he felt empty. Numb, hollow. The voices in his head played like a broken record, repeating the same thing over and over again. It was Lilith birthday in a few days, he wanted to remember how happy they all were.

However he could find no escape by retracting into his mind, and hiding. The attack came from it. He could only sit and deal with the cacophony of words as best he could, which was terribly. He had been in that same position for what seemed like hours. He needed to move.

However, he didn't have the energy, instead he collapsed backwards, and shuffled slightly, so he lay horizontally across the bed, long legs still draping off the side. The feelings of sadness that he had buried were back, threatening to burst out of him.  
'Weak', he thought, 'Idiot and useless.'

'He would write about what happened later, but first he needed to gain control of himself.  
He lay in the dark coolness of his room for a few more moments, before pushing himself back up into a sitting position, he groaned as pain shot through his neck from remaining in such an uncomfortable position for a long time. He rolled his shoulders to work the stiffness out of the tense muscles

He couldn't focus when the voices were screaming at him, so he dug his nails into the pale flesh of his palms hard, leaving red crescents that stood out against the white. The pain distracted him from the voices. He welcomed the pain.

Michael was right. His father was right. He was too weak, a failure. His best would never be good enough. He would never be good enough.

He would always be a failure, he wanted to make his brothers proud, he wanted to to be there for them. His baby sister died. He saw MC's body on the floor. He had accepted that truth ages ago, death and darkness followed. 

He scrubbed at his face with both hands, did his brothers know that he cared and loved for them? Do they know that he would burn the whole world down for them? 


End file.
